Gay older and younger
11 Ways to Identify an Older or Younger Man for a Relationship– Lgbtq+ Age Gap Dating website Advice
When it comes to attraction, a large age gap brings with it numerous nuances. One of arguably the biggest hurdles to overcome is the first. How to meet an older partner or younger partner?
From finding a fling to revealing marriage material, for gay men, actively finding a spouse that’s significantly older or younger can feel much more difficult than for those seeking those similar to their age.
Aside from the reduced number of people genuinely interested in digital dating someone 15 years, 20 years, 30 years + apart from them (like TheAgeGapGuys have), location plays the biggest part. This isn't meaning physical distance between people – though that naturally impacts relationship sustainability – but the long term location (i.e. where you live and work) of the person seeking to join an older / younger man.
Your location impacts an enormous array of things for queer men, including but not limited to:
The legality of homosexuality
Liberalness and acceptance of gay people and age gap relationships,
If there are many homosexual men residing nearby
Adoption and use
Gay Relationship Advice: Navigating Age-Gap Relationships
I’ve been an LGBTQ+ Affirmative Therapist for nearly ten years, and quite often, the topic of age differences comes up with my unpartnered queer-identified male clients and quite often is present in the same-sex couples or families I work with. Here are some of my thoughts and ideas in the form of some gay relationship directions.
Age differences in gay men in a romantic relationship is a very ordinary phenomenon but is still one that often raises questions or concerns in my clients as a topic and sometimes requires some navigation in same-sex attracted couples therapydue to the unique connection dynamics involved.
Find our more about what therapy for homosexual men is appreciate with me here.
If you're curious about your relationship, I just created anLGBTQ+ Relationship Quiz to help queer couples identify blindspots and growth points and to celebrate strengths. It's totally free and I'll email you a free 15 page PDF breakdown of your results.
One of the things this test looks at is 'balance' which is all to undertake with dynamics just like age differences, that can sometimes cause a affair to struggle
Gay Relationship Advice: Age Gaps in Gay Relationships
Many of my LGBTQ counseling clients ask me why they are only attracted to gay men younger than themselves. If you are happy dating website gay men in their twenties, then this question is not important. It’s like asking “Why do I prefer blondes over brunettes?” My advice is to let yourself enjoy dating whomever interests you (as long as they are over the age of 18).
Age gap relationships are more common than you may realize. In western countries:
- 1 out of every twelve male/female couples has an age gap of 10 years or more
- that number increase to 25% in male/male couples
- and 15% of female/female relationships
That same study indicated that age gap partners are more satisfied and more committed to each other than partners of similar age–though there is some investigate that points to a correlation with higher rates of divorce. Research also shows that couples with an age gap of less than ten years are happier than those with an age gap greater than ten years. You can find more details on these stats on this episode of the podcast I Love You Too, by Psychotherapist, Dating Coach, Couples Counselor Jessica Engle,
Most of the aging process doesn’t scare me. The idea of having gray hair is exciting, so long as I still have hair when that time comes. I reflect my smile lines form me look dashing in some lights. (In others, like Annabelle.) I hold no reason to tap my toes, so no biggie there. If I end up aging anything like my mother, I’ll have close to zero complaints.
What does scares me though, is the thought of being an ancient twink. Here's a slam course for my beloved straight readers: In the gay community, there are different sub-categories of gays. I’m not exactly sure how they came to be, but surely it has something to complete with the innate demand to group things together by category. (Think #organizationporn.) Whatever the reason, a multitude of factors perform into how you’re sorted, but by large, they come down to your age and body type.
A twink is a new, skinny, typically hairless fresh gay man like Justin Beiber.
A bear is an older, heavier set male lover man with ample body and facial hair favor Ron Offerman.
An otter is like a bear but leaner like Zachary Quinto.
Those are just three of them — there are plenty more. Jock, snake, cub, wolf, pup, pocket gay, daddy, beaver. (Just kiddi